This is the third posting of a series in radical forgiveness. Please visit the first post “Finding Forgiveness” for Part I or “Finding Forgiveness Part II” as well.
Forgiveness action plan: Lama Marut assigns the first week’s work to write a list of all the people who have caused you pain in any form. Write down what each person did to you and how you feel about it. For the entire week, we are asked to concentrate on one or more of these people to see how we feel about each of these people. Evaluate the feelings around it: how does it feel to have this anger, pain, resentment, hatred? Are these feelings helping you progress toward your goals? He reminds us that happiness comes from keeping your eyes wide open. He emphasizes that forgiveness does not mean condoning hurtful behavior, as hurtful behavior causes suffering for the offender as much as for the offended. Remember the golden rule? What goes around, comes around.
Going through the week: Pay attention to your feelings without trying to cover them up or denying them. On a daily basis, write down your experiences in your journal. Have you already downloaded the free audio provided by Lama Marut? The last 15-20 minutes of the podcast contain a meditation to help facilitate this process. (Inciting Happiness Part I).
In summary for this week’s “Finding Forgiveness”, remember this nugget: you can summon the energy and courage required to face the negativity all at once and take back the reins for your happiness. Or, you can choose to continue on the same path: anger, resentment, & challenging afflictions steering your life, mind, body and spirit. They slowly suck all the innocence, joy and goodness right out of your heart and soul, replacing it with scar tissue from the battles of life. It may surprise you to learn that the energy required is the same for both options, and perhaps even more if you do nothing.
Weigh out the cost of happiness and freedom versus anger, blame, and misery. What is your life – your very short and precious time in this body – worth to you? Will you remain comfortable with this reality that you have always known, even if you know you aren’t as happy as you could be? Or will you take the reins to your life back and steer yourself toward a joyful, peaceful, vibrant reality?
I will share my surprising experience with this forgiveness process. Please share your experiences with me too!
With love,
Frances
For additional support, you may also visit the free resources on Lama Marut’s website.
